this is a most special day to me.
today is my 8 year wedding anniversary.
when mark and i prayed about what day we would wed i felt God whisper in my heart "you always felt your life ended on may 2nd so your new life will begin on may 3rd."
such a sweet God to think of everything, even the perfect day to get married.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Sunday, May 2, 2010
the day my heart stopped
today is the day 21 years ago that my heart stopped. it took quite a few years for it to start beating again. but it did and i'm glad. i wouldn't trade my life now for anything, but sometimes i wonder. what would my life have been like if my first husband had lived.
how many children would we have had?
what kind of life would we be living?
would we even still be married? next year would be our 25th wedding anniversary.
so many questions.
the fact remains that he did not survive, he went to meet Jesus on may 2, 1989 and be with our 2 babies in heaven.
i believe you can't live through something like this and not have it change you forever. the choice is always how will it change you, for better or worse. i believe i have been changed for the good. death made me hard at first, like a protective shell, but as time went on the shell grew soft and finally fell away.
but i still remember especially on this day.
how many children would we have had?
what kind of life would we be living?
would we even still be married? next year would be our 25th wedding anniversary.
so many questions.
the fact remains that he did not survive, he went to meet Jesus on may 2, 1989 and be with our 2 babies in heaven.
i believe you can't live through something like this and not have it change you forever. the choice is always how will it change you, for better or worse. i believe i have been changed for the good. death made me hard at first, like a protective shell, but as time went on the shell grew soft and finally fell away.
but i still remember especially on this day.
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